


Friends Or More?

by Aliemah



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Awkwardness, Cute, Ficlet Collection, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-05
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-07-29 11:51:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7683418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aliemah/pseuds/Aliemah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a collection of ficlets pulled from a list of prompts titled 'Friends or more' on tumblr. I took it as a challenge to try and use each prompt to spawn at least one fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Maybe I Am Jealous

"Hey, Kaidan, got a minute?" Kristen said as she rounded the corner. It was the end of her shift, and the use of his first name caught his attention quickly.

"Sure, what's up?" he said, actually looking forward to their upcoming shore leave. He was hoping to finally manage to ask Kristen on something resembling a date, but he wasn't sure how to do it, or if she'd even be interested in such a thing.

"Okay, long story but I kind of have a date tomorrow night, and this guy is bringing a friend and I'm honestly a little creeped out but I don't want to be rude and so I was wondering if maybe you'd want to tag along just in case things go wrong?" she said, her words almost flowing together in such a way that he barely kept up. Her face was also a little pink and she was rocking on her feet a bit.

"Uh… sure." he said, not entirely sure what he was getting himself into. But it was a chance to be out with her, and if there was a chance he could get her out of a bad situation, that couldn't hurt him. She sighed and thanked him.

"I'll give you the details later!" she called out before she disappeared into the medbay, no doubt going to check up on Liara again. He smiled, and then realized this was not the way he wanted his shore leave to go. He was supposed to go on a date with _her_ not go to a date as her wingman.

"Shit." he grumbled, shutting off the console and going to lay down to get some shuteye.

* * *

_KS: Feel free to swing by my apartment whenever. I'll probably take longer than you to get ready, regardless._

_KA: Maybe I should help you, then._

_KS: I might need it. This dress is ridiculous._

_KA: So then don't wear it?_

_KS: How often do I get the chance to dress up? I'm wearing it._

_KA: Fine. I'll drop by in an hour and just finish getting ready there, if that's okay._

_KS: Totally fine with me. See you in a bit._

He sighed and tossed his omni-tool onto the other end of the couch, looking around at the small apartment. He had an hour before he'd have to leave. Kaidan didn't want to go on this double date with Kristen, but it was better than nothing. Besides, he'd get to see her in a dress - that was a rare sight on its own. But he had more than a few pictures in his mind of what she might look like. Regardless, she was beautiful, Kaidan knew that much for sure.

He pushed himself up, knowing he should probably change out of whatever he was wearing now. He hadn't gone outside the apartment all day. On that thought, Kaidan realized showering might not be such a terrible idea either. It would eat up some time. He could probably use a good shave, too. After a moment, Kaidan laughed at himself, knowing he was just coming up with excuses to prolong what he was so nervous about. At least he was going at all, and wouldn't have to be worried about what happened. And maybe he would save her from something awful or embarrassing happening.

Somehow, a half hour had passed, and Kaidan was in the middle of shaving, figuring he'd been long overdue for one. His omni-tool started chirping and he groaned, having to step out of the bathroom and into the living room to fetch it. A series of messages from Kristen had popped up.

_KS: God, he's already annoying me._

_KS: No, I don't want to leave early, dummy. There's a reason I said the time that I did._

_KS: He won't stop asking if I'm ready._

_KS: Seriously, I've been asked if I'm ready like ten times in the last three minutes._

_KS: Kaidan, please tell me you aren't dead, I have a feeling I'm going to need a rescue._

He couldn't help but chuckle at the last message, replying to her.

_KA: Tell him you're still trying to find the right shoes or something, I don't know._

_KA: I'll be over in ten minutes._

Kaidan walked back intot he bathroom with the omni-tool, finishing his shaving quickly, but remaining clean. He threw on his clean shirt and pants, grabbing his jacket before heading out with his omni-tool, glad he still had two minutes to go up a few floors to the newer apartments where Kristen was. And they still had about 20 minutes before they needed to be anywhere.

When he got off the elevator, he immediately saw the problem Kristen was having. The man was standing right outside her door, messaging her. He stood back for a moment.

_KA: He's standing outside your door._

_KS: I know! It's creepy as hell… I'll try to unlock the door without him noticing, or maybe I'll tell him that I'll be out soon and meet him out in the lobby to send him away._

_KA: Whatever you want to do. I'll wait by the elevator, though._

A few minutes went by, and Kaidan noticed that the man began walking over towards the elevator, looking a bit off put. Though once he was in the elevator and headed down, Kaidan walked over towards the door, gently touching the door panel to let her know he was there. The door opened after a moment, and Kristen peeked out, sighing when she saw him, and waving him in quickly.

"Thank god you're here." she said once the door locked again. "I'm honestly not even sure I want to go on this date anymore." she said, pulling at her dress. It looked older than vintage just from the style. It was a halter neck and the skirt of it flared out from her waist, making her look incredibly petite, and…

God, she was beautiful.

"I'm going to go finish putting on my makeup… Make yourself comfortable." she sighed, turning in her bare feet - painted toes matching her fingers. He hadn't seen this side of her before, but he was already falling hard for her - harder than before, at least. He shook himself from his thoughts and decided to look around the living room. There wasn't much - medals and photos from ceremonies. Nothing that was actually very personal. He might have to ask about that later.

Not five minutes later, Kristen walked out, having done amazing work for the short amount of time it took with her makeup. It was nothing fancy for a night out, but seeing her all done up for someone else made him wish that he could have talked her out of this, or asked her to go out with him, instead. She pulled up her omni-tool, and visibly cringed as a messaged popped up.

"Ugh, he's back outside… This is going to be a little awkward." she muttered, shaking herself a bit before putting that fake smile on her face before opening the door. Kaidan didn't hesitate to step over by her to see what happened.

"Kristen! It's nice to finally meet you."

"Yeah, you too, Malcom." she said, clearing her throat and turning towards Kaidan. "This is Kaidan." he stepped forward and held out his hand for Malcom. The other man only looked at his hand before turning his full attention back to Kristen.

"Are you ready to go, then?"

"That's why I'm here." she said, the tone clear to him that she wasn't excited, and incredibly sarcastic. He almost laughed, and followed them from behind.

"I hope you're in the mood for some sushi. I just found this voucher online, take a look. Free food!"

Kristen glanced at his omni-tool in the elevator, her arms crossed around her middle as she stood between the two men.

"You know this voucher only works for couples, right?" she deadpanned. If that wasn't a slap to this man's ego, Kaidan would have been impressed.

"Yeah, well…" he started, "It's… good for a few more weeks, you know."

"Let's just see how tonight goes." she sighed, quickly stepping off the elevator.

"She's playing hard to get…" Malcom laughed to Kaidan. "Bet you see her like this all the time."

"No, I don't." he murmured, too mesmerized by the way her dress flowed around her, the black pumps giving her a hint of elegance and grace - a different kind than he's grown accustomed to seeing. She looked like an angel in the royal blue dress. For the second time that night, Kaidan wished this had been their date instead of just hers. So far, he was just a third wheel. But, it was only the beginning to their night.

He followed Kristen and Malcom for a little bit before Kristen glanced back, smiling as she looped her arm through Kaidan's and quickly starting up a conversation with him that she was aware Malcom wouldn't be able to seriously contribute too. Kaidan took that as a sign that she wasn't interested anymore. But, she was polite, and would at least see the night through. Probably.

The dinner itself wasn't any less awkward, or awful. There was plenty of blanket statements from both himself and Kristen when Malcom asked about their work, and then there were straight up insensitive questions.

"Is it true biotics can throw tens of people all at once?" Malcom directed to Kaidan.

"I don't know about tens of people but I can certainly throw one person pretty far." he said as he sipped his drink. Kristen snorted, and tried to cover it up with a cough, glancing out of the corner of her eye at him with a grin.

"He's amazing." she said softly. "I've never seen any biotic have the amount of control he does over himself."

"I don't blame him, they're outright dangerous. I'm surprised you're even comfortable around him when he could kill you with a flick of his wrist."

"Excuse me," Kristen suddenly growled, her whole body seeming to grow large and intimidating even as she sat, "but there's a reason I asked him to come. To protect me from scumbags like you. Not that I couldn't handle it myself, of course, but I like to leave my options open." she paused for a moment and then shifted to stand up. "Thank you for the dinner, but I'd rather not ever see or speak to you again. Kaidan, let's go." she practically barked out to him. He smirked at Malcom before standing up to follow her out.

Though it faded when he saw how quickly she was walking, and how tight her arms were wrapped around herself. He had to jog a bit to catch up, and he pulled her aside once he saw an empty bench. They were alone for the moment, and he wanted to ask what was wrong, but he wasn't sure that she'd want to talk. Though when she leaned against him, and put her head on his shoulder with a heavy sigh, he looked down at her.

"I'm tired of going on dates like this… I know nothing is going to come of it, and I still go. I don't know why." she said quietly, crossing her ankles as she pulled them beneath the bench.

"I know how you feel." he said quietly. "I haven't gone out on an actual date in years." he chuckled, "I don't even think I remember who it was with, last."

"Remind me how old you are again?" Kristen asked with a tiny laugh.

"I'm thirty-two. My last date was well over three years ago, I know that much." he smiled, glancing down at his hands as he wrung them out of habit.

There had been one late night the two of them had sat talking like this, but it had been aboard the Normandy. He'd started wringing his hands much like he was now, but he'd been stopped after a minute when Kristen placed her small hand over his, and managed to pull one of them into her lap, tracing patterns on his palm while they struggled to stay awake.

She did that same thing just now, only she held his hand instead. He smiled and hoped he wasn't just imagining all of this, and what it could have meant. For now, they watched ships come and go, chatting quietly for some time before Kaidan felt his back growing sore.

"We should get you back home." Kaidan said, giving her hand a small squeeze.

"I have a question to ask you, before we leave." she smirked, sitting up, "Are you still hungry? That wasn't a lot of sushi and to be honest I'm not sure how I feel about it."

"I can always eat more, you know that." he laughed.

"Let's go get something else to eat and then take it back to my place. We can eat there."

"Alright."

They both stood up, and even though they dropped their hands, she did loop her arm through his again as they walked, seeming a bit unsteady. It was probably the shoes, he thought. How she could walk in them to begin with was beyond him. As she steered him through the wards, searching intently for a certain place, he got the chance to see her at her most relaxed. Then she suddenly turned with a grin and pulled him to a counter, already seeming to know what she wanted because she was suddenly ordering. It sounded good so he let her order the same for him. Not five minutes later he was carrying a bag filled with food and letting her lead the way again.

Then he was pulled from his trance as Kristen leaned over to rest her head on his shoulder while they sat on her couch in the dark. Why it was dark, he couldn't remember. But the containers of food were empty on the coffee table and he felt like he'd eaten just enough.

"Thanks for coming with me tonight. I'm sorry you had to be the third wheel." she said quietly.

"It's alright. I'm just glad no one started chasing us, or shooting at us."

"Yeah I don't know, it was kind of boring." she laughed. It wasn't her usual laugh, either, it was light, relaxed, and tired. He joined in and glanced down at her. "To be honest I had more fun leaving than I did before then."

"I was surprised you took the high road and didn't punch him, or cause a big scene."

"Wanted to." she grinned, laughing to herself and curling up some. Then she sighed, "But really, thank you for coming... And sticking with me afterwards..."

"Any time."

Things were silent, and Kaidan couldn't help but reach over and play with a bit of her hair, brushing it from her face as her eyes closed.

"Malcom was an ass, I hope he get rejected for the next five years." she muttered.

"I'd say for the next ten, myself."

"Why's that?"

"No reason."

"No, come on, tell me." she laughed, still leaning against him and seeming to enjoy what he was doing. Or at least she didn't mind.

"There's nothing to tell."

"Kaidan, if you don't tell me, I'm going to have to assume the worst."

"And what would be the worst?" he laughed at her, not ready for anything she would say next.

"I'd have to say it's because you were jealous."

He froze, and felt himself blush despite not even looking at her. Her hair dropped from his hand and he rested it on the back of the couch, looking away. Kristen lifted her head rather quick, and he could tell she was smiling.

"Kaidan..?"

"Hm?" he glanced back, out of habit.

"You're not jealous are you?" her voice was much softer, and she was turned completely towards him on her knees.

"Shepard, that's-" he started with a small laugh of his own, fully prepared to deny any feelings he had and high tail it out of her apartment.

"Yes or no."

She was persuasive.

"Okay. Maybe I _am_ a little jealous. It's.. no big deal." he shook his head and pulled his arm back to himself. "I should get going."

"No, stay." she grinned, grabbing his hand as he stood up, pulling him back. "I don't get to spend a lot of time with you, and... you don't need to be jealous of some ass like Malcom. Honestly, Kaidan, you really think I'd ever want a guy like that? A guy that has no idea what I go through in any given day?" Kaidan found himself sinking back into the seat, watching her open up to him in the dark, the light from the window pouring in and making her nothing more than a tempting silhouette with an equally tempting voice. "I don't think I could ever settle down with a civilian to be honest. Sure, it's nice to have something reliable to come back to, but... there's nothing to talk about. I mean, Malcom was making small talk with me and I was about ready to rip off my ears because I was so bored. At least with you I can talk about things I do, and you understand. Most of the time you're there anyway..."

She went on and on, but he'd long tuned out to what she was saying. A bad idea in general, but he was fixated on how passionate emotional she was getting. He rarely saw her show anything but basic emotions - happiness, anger, sadness on one occasion. And here she was, everything pouring out. Kristen didn't seem to be the type to do anything but wear her heart on her sleeve outside of work.

"... but sometimes it's just nice to be able to... sit down with some friends and make terrible jokes about how bad you drive a military vehicle, or... poke fun at stupid little things we say too much." she sighed, pushing herself back into the couch, deflated, and then yawning.

It was silent for a few minutes, and for the first time that night, Kaidan's heart was calm. Kristen leaned against him again, and this time she reached up, grabbed his hand, and pulled his arm around her with a small hum.

"I should let you get some sleep, Kristen." he said quietly. "Maybe... we could get lunch tomorrow."

"Lunch sounds good." she grinned as she sat up and let go of his hand. "Just promise you won't harass me outside my door."

"I promise. I'll harass you through lunch." he grinned as he turned to leave, waving her goodnight.


	2. Kissing and Cuddles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: "Maybe I want to kiss you because it's cold and about to be cuddle season." MShenko.

Even after the war, the two of them had remained friends. Kaidan had moved to his parent’s orchard, to live with his mother and help take care of her and the farm. Blake had moved into an apartment with a nice view of the bay, and he swore if he looked hard and long enough, he could see that very farm off in the distance. They talked regularly, and on a few occasions, Blake had set up his guest room for Kaidan to stay in, if he got out of the office late, and had to go in early the next day. Outside of work, the two of them usually shared a few beers at the bar every Thursday. It was a nice little routine they’d set up, and Blake wasn’t going to deny that he and Kaidan had started flirting with each other a little more often. But both remained stubborn, and called one another friend.

“Is it September already?” Blake asked on their way to the bar, after Kaidan commenting about the weather, and the date.

“Last I checked.” Kaidan laughed. “Been a little busy at work?”

“Just a little. Let’s not get into that.” he sighed, rubbing his hand over his face and noticing that it was indeed noticeably chillier than it had been just a few weeks ago.

“I thought that was an unspoken rule - no talking about work at the bar.”

“I guess it’s a spoken rule, now.” Blake smiled, holding the door for Kaidan as they turned to walk inside.

It wasn’t a dingy place, but it definitely wasn’t proper, either. There were stains on the floor, and walls, but the tables were clean and the atmosphere was relatively calm on most nights. They’d realized early on that Wednesday nights were Karaoke Night and had quickly changed their regular meeting time after the first three nights ended with headaches and a feeling of claustrophobia. Still, they both shrugged their jackets and sat at their usual table near the wall, just below one of the vid screens mounted on it.

They’d barely settled when one of the younger women working there brought over two drinks. It seemed as though they were regulars, now. The woman gave Kaidan a wink, and Blake couldn’t help but chuckle when she walked away, Kaidan blushing slightly as he sipped his beer, smiling.

“What are you laughing at?”

“She’s had her eye on you for months, now, Kaidan. You haven’t even said hi to her, or asked her for her name.” Blake said, reaching for his drink, only sliding it closer.

“I’m just not that interested in a relationship like that, right now.” he said, leaning back once his bottle was set down, much lighter than it had been a moment ago.

“Saying hi doesn’t mean you have to commit to something, Kaidan. It’s just being friendly.”

“Blake, I’m just not interested.” He laughed lightly, playing with the bottle. “Just let it go.”

“Fine. But if she comes over again, I’m asking her name for you.”

Kaidan rolled his eyes with a sigh and a smile, ignoring Blake’s words and initiating conversation about other topics. What their other friends were up to, what he’d been up to outside of work, and other mundane, safe topics. From his end. Not so much when Blake turned the questions back to him.

“I don’t think I ever heard about what happened with you and that doctor you met her a few weeks ago... Didn’t you two go on a date?”

“Yeah, but... it didn’t work out. We didn’t have much to talk about, and what we did was....” he trailed off and shrugged.

“I’m sorry it didn’t work out.” Blake said, then leaning forward a bit. “Just tell me that’s not the reason you’re not looking for a relationship right now.”

“Blake, I didn’t say I wasn’t looking for a relationship, I’m just not looking for a specific type.”

“We’re friends, tell me. I want to help you.”

“No.” he smiled, leaning back with his beer again.

“Come on-”

“I’m going to keep telling you no, Blake. You know I won’t have a problem saying no to this.”

“Fine. Don’t let me help you so you can stop worrying about dying alone.” he said, mock offended, though partially serious about it. He just wanted Kaidan to be happy, after all. He was a nice guy, and they’d been friends for a long time, now.

The evening went on, and got more exciting as the Bioti-ball game started. The two got too lost in the game to remember how many drinks they’d had, but luckily enough they could both walk to their destinations. Or rather Blake could walk to his apartment, and Kaidan could get a cab, as he usually did on Thursdays. Either way, the two of them left shortly after the game had ended in a win for their preferred team.

“Do you want me to wait with you until your cab gets here?” Blake asked once they got outside, both shivering a little at the breeze.

“I was actually going to ask if you wouldn’t mind if I stayed at your place for a couple hours. I just don’t want to show up this drunk with my mom waiting.” he smiled.

“Sure. Come on.” Blake gently grabbed his arm to pull him in the general direction of his apartment. And, stubborn as he was, he decided to try one last time to figure out why Kaidan didn’t want to ask for that woman’s name. He responded with a sigh.

“Look, Blake, I’m still trying to figure things out with myself, and what I want. I know for a fact that while that woman is nice, and we’d probably have a great time, she’s just not what I’m looking for.”

“Then you should just tell me what you’re looking for so I can help you out. Is it so wrong for me to want to help you?”

“No, but I don’t need help looking. I just need to do this in my own time, is all.”

“So you found someone?” Blake asked, glancing over as his hands shoved further into his pockets. Kaidan smiled.

“Kinda.” he said quietly, glancing up to the sky and letting out yet another sigh, though this one was more tired than from a lack of conversation.

“Maybe you should stay at my place tonight.” Blake said after giving him a once over, noticing that Kaidan’s feet were shuffling a bit. His eyes closed for a moment as he walked.

“Maybe I should just kiss you.” he mumbled. Blake barely caught on to it.

“What was that?”

“I said,” he started, voice clearer, and stronger, eyes opening as he stared ahead, “maybe I should kiss you.” Blake smiled, letting out a small laugh.

“And why would you do that?”

“Well,” he shrugged, not seeming to care anymore, “maybe I want to kiss you because it’s cold, and about to be cuddle season.”

Blake laughed again, and Kaidan joined him as they walked alone down the street, eventually calming down as they turned the corner. They kept stealing looks, never looking for more than a few seconds.

Truthfully, Blake had never thought that Kaidan would be interested in him. He’d tried to make it more than a little obvious how he felt towards Kaidan months ago, but that all seemed to go over his head. And now, they were settled into routines, and either Kaidan was finally comfortable with the idea, having realized it long ago, or he was only now realizing that maybe he had feelings for Blake, too.

“Look, if I made things too awkward, I can just go home, now.” Kaidan said as they approached the door to the building, rubbing his neck as he tended to do when he was nervous.

“I’ve just spent a long time thinking... There wasn’t anything more between us.” Blake shrugged, pausing to talk before they either headed in to talk more, or parted ways and tried to forget what happened.

“Sorry, I’ve just been trying to figure this out. And you’ve been pushing it all night, I just-”

“I should be the one apologizing. I shouldn’t have pushed, but you know how I am once I have an idea and some alcohol in me.”

“It’s not that bad, I’m just a little sensitive to the topic because I’ve been wanting to tell you for a long time now. It just hasn’t been a good time.”

“Kaidan,” Blake smiled, “You’re always looking for the right time, and you should know by now there’s never really a right time for anything. But besides that, you’ve known I’ve had feelings for you, you should have known how I might react to something like that.” He paused to step forward, hesitantly taking Kaidan’s hand from his pocket to hold it. “If you want to go on a more formal date than just the bar, I’d be happy to see what happens.”

“What if I just wanted to kiss you?” he grinned.

“Hm... If you kiss me you have to go on a date with me.”

“Done.” Kaidan said, leaning forward before Blake could even comprehend what he’d said. He felt his hand being squeezed a bit as their lips meshed together for a moment in a sloppy kiss. Though, if they were expecting anything else while drunk, they really were idiots. Either way, after a moment they pulled apart and laughed quietly, grinning broadly.

“So...” Blake gave his hand a tug towards the door, “what was that about it being cuddle season soon?”

“I love cuddling when it’s chilly outside. There’s just something nice about being with someone, or holding them and being warm when it’s not warm.” He said, then launching into the specifics as they walked through the lobby, then towards the elevator.

Blake was always open to cuddling, and he wouldn’t mind a few more kisses, either.

**End.**


	3. Offended

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: "I'm personally offended that you didn't get me to be your fake date."
> 
> This is gonna be a more modern day AU, because... why not. More or less inspired by notnowcommander‘s fic Two and a Half Steps.

Also posted on tumblr and ff.net.

* * *

 

John was more than a little suspicious when Ashley had disappeared without a word for about a week, only answering what few messages he sent with either clipped sentences or single words at a time. She was distracted by something, and he was determined to find out. The two of them had plans this upcoming weekend, and he needed to know she wouldn’t bail on him.

He tossed his phone onto his lousy excuse of a bed, and stripped his clothes to go take a shower. John didn’t want to think she’d snuck off with some guy again - that had happened before and some bad things had happened, mostly to her bank account and her job. And that was why she’d been living with him for the past eight months or so. Ashley was getting back on her feet though, and talked about maybe finding her own apartment nearby.

He’d never admit it, but the thought of her leaving made him feel uneasy. The two of them had been friends since they were kids, they’d always gone to the same school, even the same college. At one point they’d even considered the possibility of dating, but it seemed like she’d moved on pretty quick after it was brought up. He still regretted not jumping at the chance.

Once he got out of his shower, he checked his phone, hoping for a reply to the plans they had made. There was nothing except a missed call from an unknown number. There wasn’t a voicemail so he ignored that fact and double checked to make sure the message sent while he went to pull some fresh clothes on.

The rest of his day, until he got called in to go to work, was spent trying to figure out where she might have run off to, and when she might be coming back. John went so far as to ask what few co-workers knew her well enough, but it seemed no one knew at all where she went. He sighed and pulled open the door to the gym floor, making rounds asking everyone if they needed anything, or occasionally helping them out with their technique.

John had worked at this gym for about 5 years now as a personal trainer, only coming in during the afternoons, usually, or on his days off, he got called in sometimes to fill in for someone else. He liked his job, and he was paid well enough for it to stick around. Not many of the others had stuck around for as long, most only sticking it out for a year and a half before moving on. Though, that was mostly due to some of the clients that walked in.

There was a particular gaggle of mothers who came in at least three times a week, wearing obnoxiously bright clothing, to match their obnoxiously loud voices, and they would always request that a personal trainer come help them - always male, and always either James, Kaidan, or himself.

What made these women extremely obnoxious to John in particular, was that they would always scream about how they were married any time John verbally corrected something, or if he came anywhere within three feet of them. But they certainly didn’t act like they were happy, with the way they were constantly flirting, making comments, and not so secretly checking out their trainers.

Lo and behold, he instinctively shuddered when he heard the shrill laugh, forcing a smile on his face. James and Kaidan were both off today, which meant he was really being put through hell. It was almost the end of his shift, too.

Ashley had begun working here about 4 months ago, either cleaning off machinery, or working the front desk and handing out equipment or taking cards. When these women came in, Ashley always tried to be politely rude, making John laugh. Not to mention she always tried to make some excuse that John wasn’t available, and that another trainer was available to them.

She wasn’t here to protect him, or make him smile.

Just then his pocket buzzed, and he took a sharp turn into one of the empty rooms when he saw Ashley was calling. He narrowly avoided the receptionists line of sight, forcing the women to turn out when they heard they couldn’t get their trainer.

“Ash?”

“Hey John.” her voice sounded raw, and tired. “First of all, I’m sorry I skipped out for a few days-”

“A few days? Ashley you were gone for a whole week.”

“Fine, whatever. I’ll tell you all about it when I get home. I just called to ask what you wanted from Palaven Burgers.”

John could tell her phone went over the phone because her voice became muffled, and a lower, familiar voice could be heard.

“Who’s with you?” he asked quickly.

“Kaidan. Why?”

“I... What’s he doing with you?”

“I’ll tell you when I get home, now what do you want?”

“You know what I usually get. That’ll be fine. But listen, Ash, I’m at work right now, I still have an hour-”

“I’ll throw it in the microwave to keep it warm. Hey, do you care if Kaidan comes over for a bit? He said his roommate is uh... occupying his apartment right now with some company.”

“It’s fine I suppose.”

“Alright. Have fun with work, talk to you later.” she said with a happy, sing-song voice that really only meant one thing. He groaned and shoved his phone into his pocket, going to the locker room quickly to grab a few things, and then heading back out to find a punching bag.

Why didn’t she tell him? She could have just... told him. There was no need to sneak around like that, not with one of his best friends.

He’d known Kaidan maybe a little longer than he’d known Ash. Kaidan had disappeared, and gone to a private school for a little bit, coming back with a completely different attitude, and a few issues, but he’d worked them out by now and he was a perfectly functioning human being. The three of them had been through a lot together, and when they were in high school, Kaidan had been the one to suggest to John that he and Ashley would make a great pair. They were always hanging out together, anyway, she’d practically lived at his house. John denied it, saying it would be too weird. Besides, he’d had his eye on another girl for a while, and wanted to see where that might take him.

As he hit the punching bag, sweat beginning to form on his brow, he recalled all the times the three of them had been together - all the times he’d wondered if Kaidan might have swooped in to take Ashley for himself. He always denied it, and he’d never lied to John before - in fact he’d said that Ashley was too much like family for him to have anything other than a platonic interest in her. But there had been looks, and laughs, and jokes...

He leaned himself against the bag to steady it, catching his breath. He let out a soft groan as he stood upright, his arm a bit strained. He went easy on himself as he made rounds again, the gym emptying out as it neared closing. Sometimes he wondered what it might be like if they were open later, or even 24/7. There were times he’d have liked to come in at 2 AM and just run, or punch something.

Soon enough, he was back in his car, heading home and feeling a bit better, knowing Ashley was back. The drive was shorter, as well, and within what seemed like a matter of seconds, John was climbing up the stairs, and opening up the front door, immediately smelling the burgers, and hearing Ashley’s laugh. The door shut itself heavily, and she called his name out, appearing around the corner and taking John completely by surprise.

She’d gone to prom with him, unable to find anyone else willing to ask her to go, and truthfully the two would have spent the evening together anyway. Ashley looked beautiful then, but... what he saw now blew that amazement out of the water.

Rarely was her hair down, let alone tampered with. Instead of the slight wavy brown hair he was used to, it was completely straight, and glossy. Her eyes looked brighter than usual, the surrounding area slightly smudged with a mix of dark brown eye shadow and eyeliner, and likely mascara too. Her lips, he could tell, used to be a light red, but that too had smudged a bit and come off.

And sometimes, John would admit, he forgot just how much of a woman Ashley was. Bare shoulders gave way to a sweetheart neckline of a light blue dress. It was tight to her waist, where it gave way to a thickly wrapped piece of black ribbon, with a slightly more forgiving fabric of the same color that simply fell freely after the apex of her hips following that, ending at her knees with a sense of modesty and appeal.

Ashley held her hands in front of her, wringing them slightly with her palms to the ceiling, and her lips curved into a smile. They both stood there for a second before she took a few steps forward, reaching out to hug him.

“Whoa, hold on.” he laughed. “I just got back from work, I’m all sweaty, and...” he swallowed, looking down at her now that she was right in front of him, “I... don’t want to ruin that dress.” He paused. “Uh... why are you wearing a dress?”

“Come eat and I’ll fill you in.” she said, motioning back to the living room that was on the other side of the hall they were in.

“Give me five minutes to shower, please.” he smiled, feeling absolutely gross covered in sweat. Not to mention his arm was still in pain.

“Fine. I’ll heat up your dinner while I wait.” she spun on her heels - her feet bare and toes painted silver. The fabric of her dress flowed behind her, showing the slight sway of her hips as she walked. John followed her down the hall until she turned to go back to the living room, then to the small kitchen. He peered in for a moment, not too surprised to see Kaidan lounging on the couch with a burger in hand, wearing a nice suit. They both waved without saying a word, and he turned to go shower, confused.

Where would she go that would require dressing up like that?

He repeated that question over and over while he rinsed off, finding no answer as he thought to himself. Once he pulled on his clothes he went back out, sitting on Ashley’s other side, and thanking her as he took a bite of his burger.

“So where were you?” he asked, yet again, after swallowing a few bites. She had already finished eating, so she was free to talk now. And he wasn’t going to let her leave without telling him.

“I was at my sister’s wedding.” she started, rubbing the back of her neck a bit as she looked slightly embarrassed. “She called me Saturday, and I left for the day to go there, but she called me again Sunday saying she needed help setting things up, and making sure all these things were ready-”

“Seems like she took advantage of you, a bit.” John mentioned between bites.

“I mean.  A bit. But, she’s my sister, what am I going to do?” she shrugged, and sighed. “Anyway, I... called Kaidan, to see if he might feel like helping me, and keeping me company. He’s always had an eye for details. And... we stayed and the wedding was today.”

John nodded, a question coming to mind quickly.

“I thought your sister was only a few minutes away? Why didn’t you come back?”

“Destination wedding.” she rolled her eyes. “I know a couple of hours isn’t a bad drive, but... with how early she needed things to get done, and how late we ended up staying awake, it was just easier to stay at the hotel. Besides, she helped pay for the room, since she knows I’m still trying to recover from... what happened.”

“That would explain that, yeah.” he sighed, not able to ignore the knot in his stomach that was keeping him from eating anymore. He glanced over to Kaidan, watching him text on his phone, presumably to his roommate. It was getting later by the minute, and they both looked pretty tired. He knew he would be after driving all that time. “So, um... how was it?”

“It was cute.” Ashley grinned. “Definitely had a little bit of both of them everywhere, and it seemed like the whole thing went off without a hitch. The food at the reception was pretty good, too.”

“I’m glad you had a nice time.” he said, not watching himself and letting the sarcasm line his words.

“I’m gonna head out,” Kaidan said almost immediately after, standing up, “I’ll see you at work on Wednesday.” he showed himself out, and now it was just the two of them.

John somehow finished eating, and once he was finished, he leaned back on the couch, looking around. He hadn’t cleaned much, since she hadn’t been here to bother him about it. But at least he’d kept up on the dishes and laundry. That was more than he used to do, that much he would admit.

“Thanks for getting me dinner.” he finally spoke up.

“You’re welcome... it was the least I could do after worrying you.”

“That’s putting it mildly.” he scoffed.

“Look, John. I’m sorry, okay? What’s bothering you, you aren’t usually this upset over something like this.”

“Upset? No, I’m a little beyond that. Offended, even.”

“Offended?” she crossed her arms, facing him a bit more.

“Yeah.”

“About?”

“The fact that you asked Kaidan to go with you instead of me.” he said, standing up to go... somewhere. He needed to move, so he could think. He ended up just standing in the middle of the room.

“Seriously? You’re offended over that? I find that hard to believe, I was under the impression you hated being a fake date to these things.”

“I’m personally offended that you didn’t ask me to be your fake date, alright? I would have loved to go with you, you should know that.”

“Well... I didn’t ask you, okay?” her voice grew soft and she curled in on herself a bit. “I can’t change that.” She was quiet for a moment, then she looked back up to him as he paced. “I was going to ask you but you seemed busy, and... I don’t know, I didn’t want to make things awkward.”

“Why would it be awkward, Ash? We’re already living together, in case you haven’t noticed.” he threw his arm out to gesture to the whole apartment, pausing to look at her, and listen.

“Because, I don’t really do well with people asking personal questions about a relationship I don’t have, alright? It’s bad enough that on the way back Kaidan was grilling me, and asked if we were dating-” her hands moved to cover her mouth and she immediately stood up and walked briskly from the room.

Or she tried to.

John followed her and eventually grabbed her shoulder gently before she reached the bedroom.

“Ash,” he said quietly, taking a minute to get the words out, “I... thought you might be seeing Kaidan. Do you mean to tell me you aren’t?”

“Why on earth would you think I was seeing him? He’s seeing someone else now.” she asked, ripping her shoulder away and staying facing the door, away from him.

“I don’t know, you two... you’ve been doing a lot of things together recently. Without me.” he rubbed the back of his head, sighing. The news about Kaidan was a relief but he was still upset. “Look, it doesn’t matter, I-I... I’m sorry.”

“I should have asked you. I just thought you would have said no so I went to Kaidan.”

“Why did you think I would have said no?”

“You said once that you didn’t really like weddings.” she shrugged, turning to face him again, her arms wrapped around herself in a hug.

“It depends on the company.” he muttered.

“I’ll remember to ask you next time.” she smiled, stepping closer and holding her arms out.

John leaned down a bit to wrap his arms around her, feeling the small ache in his chest start to ease. Though the nervousness was still there, and he wondered if now might be a good time to tell her what had been on his mind nearly all week.

“Would it be okay if I slept in your room tonight?” she asked while they were still close. Maybe it was a good thing, neither one of them could see the others’ face.

“That’s fine, yeah.” he tried not to seem phased by it, but when they stepped away from each other, she was smiling.

“Thanks.”

John turned back to the living room to clean it up a little before going to bed, wanting a few minutes to think it over. She deserved to know, and the sooner he got it out, the sooner something might happen. At least he’d know for sure what would happen, and how she felt. He wanted to hope she’d feel the same, but he had to remind himself that there was a chance she might not.

“You don’t have to clean up by yourself.” Ashley said, coming back out a moment later.

“Why are you still wearing that dress?” he laughed, watching her help him clean for a moment before continuing.

“I like it, and I spent a good amount of money on it, so I’m getting the most out of it I can.” she said.

“It does look good on you.” he said without hesitation while his back was turned to her. She didn’t reply for a few seconds, but when she did, she was clearly a bit distracted. He glanced over and saw the remains of a blush on her cheeks as she kept her gaze down.

Once they finished cleaning he stood leaning against the wall with his cheek pressed against it, thinking. Ashley sat herself back down on the couch, puling her phone up and John watched her for a few minutes before he quietly turned to the bedroom, about to shut the door when he remembered Ashley had wanted to stay in there with him. So he left it open and went to lay in bed and look at his own phone in the dark.

Funny enough, the first time he’d seen her wear a dress was also the first night they’d even considered sharing a bed for a night. They’d gotten back late enough that her parents had locked the door, so she was stuck with him. But she was over enough that she had what she needed at his house, already. He let her change in his room while he got them something to eat downstairs, bringing it back up so they could eat without being disturbed. At some point, they’d just fallen asleep on the bed. Sure, they woke up curled around each other, but neither thought anything of it at the time.

John thought about it all the time, though. How different would things have been for them had he spoken up sooner, and told her how he felt then? Why wait all this time?

“Hm, thought you’d be in here.” she said as she came in. “Can I turn on the light and ask a small favor?”

“Sure?”

The light flicked on and for a moment it stung his eyes, but he adjusted quick enough and sat up as she walked over, sitting herself down on the edge of the bed.

“Can you unzip me?” she said, pulling her hair over her far shoulder, and looking over at him for a split second. He reached over without a word, getting it just past her shoulder blades where she could reach the rest herself. She stood up and he watched her walk out, undressing herself the whole way. He heard her stop just outside his door and take the whole thing off, before continuing a few more steps to her room to put on something else.

He sighed and threw his arm over his eyes as he laid back, wishing he could have just said something. It was certainly too late now, wasn’t it? She didn’t like talking before going to sleep, unless she was drunk, or she’d had a bad day. But he knew she’d had a good day, so she’d go right to sleep, and tomorrow would be just like any other day. She’d never see him as anything more than the friend who let her stay with him when she got into a little trouble.

A moment later he heard the light switch flick off, and soon the bed shifted beside him as she flung herself down. He could smell the perfume she was wearing - it was fruity, and subtle. He liked that one a lot, it fit her personality. And after a moment he felt the bed shift again.

“John?”

“Hm?”

“I’m really sorry I freaked you out... I don’t know why I didn’t just tell you what was going on, I don’t know why I didn’t... ask you to come...” she paused for a second, and then he felt her scoot right up against him. Silently, the two of them shifted, and soon she was right where he wanted her to stay forever - under his arm, curled up next to him. She even threw her leg over his, completely relaxed.

“It’s fine, Ashley. You came back, you’re safe, and you had a good time. Plus you were with Kaidan, that’s... there’s worse people you could have gone with.”

“I really would have liked to go with you, if I’m being honest.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” he felt her nod against his chest. “I’m always most comfortable around you.”

He chuckled and he heard her laugh softly. John hugged her after another minute, and kissed the top of her head without thinking. Ashley then buried her face against him, and said something he could feel, but couldn’t really hear.

“What?”

“I said, I love you.”

“Well I love you too.” he said without missing a beat.

She buried her face in his chest again, but that was the last thing either of them said before they fell asleep.

And the next morning, while it was as if nothing had been said, John didn’t want to let her out of his arms, and the two laid on the couch nearly all day, just watching TV together. He’d tell her eventually how he really felt, but for now, he could be happy just having this.


End file.
